Make Working from Home Less Agonizing

As a coach and business owner, I have been working from home for years, so I wasn’t jolted into the unknown, as most people — post the shelter in place order. For me it was a choice, and it took a lot of trial and error to figure out how to do it decently. I’d craved autonomy for years while working for others, and got it — but I learned quickly that as freeing as it was, it posed A LOT of problems. I quickly felt disconnected from others. I needed militant structure. I had to remind myself to take time off from being so accountable to my goals, that I was working 7 days, around the clock. With COVID19, we don’t have the luxury of all the same options I had. I feel so much for people who are struggling to adjust now, not just because it was thrust upon them without their choice, or time to plan, but because it dramatically impacts the quality of their whole lives. But if you take time to consciously adjust to it, you can make it palatable — maybe even like it. Here are some ways my clients and I have tried with success.

Adjust personal expectations.

This is not 2 weeks ago when you were fired up about your project, happy where you were— or whatever state you, your company, or the world for that matter, were in. This is a new normal. It pains me when clients beat themselves up for not being 100% right now. If leadership is telling you to cut yourselves a break, hear that sincerely, and ask yourself: how might I adjust my expectations to meet this state. What does success look like, now? Questions like what’s my new productivity norm, what’s my daily schedule, and what hours of operation make sense, are useful. How you feel matters, and is a good success metric too — for example, if I’m a 6–10 this week on the happiness scale, that’s f’ing fantastic! When in doubt, run these by your manager/team for additional POV, and shared expectations.

Take time off. 

Part of what makes being home so agonizing, is that there’s no separation from work and “other”. And when you feel your livelihood is at stake, and that your company needs you during this pivotal moment, the instinct is to work more hours, “step up”, and do more not just out of care, but out of fear for what’s next. But burn out is real, and this is not business as usual. Taking control of your mental health is as important as ever now, and if you get that in check — your stamina, and your quality of work will follow suit. It also sets a good example to your peers and DRs. Taking time off doesn’t have to be on the fly, or lengthy in duration.Think about days, or hours that work for you and your team. Yes, your company needs you, but they need you mentally astute, stable, and productive.

Designate distinct areas.

Before COVID19 I’d go out for breaks, have lunch with friends, and taught at CycleBar, which gave me good distance from my work space. My home was far from perfect. I worked in random places at home (i.e. in bed), my kitchen was a hot mess, and I ate breakfast at my desk. That got old really fast, and even more so since the shelter in place — so I asked myself a few questions (what plants, books and magazines could I reorganize to set the mood I want? How might I use the living room for breaks?), and I made minor adjustments. Rather than eating at my desk, I’m eating in my kitchen. I put a red mat under my bike, and weights in the same nook, and now, it’s the workout area. I clean those areas every day now because having separate and organized areas, allows me to context shift, and detach from the work I was doing. It enables a bit of presence in spite of my small space, and the stress outside.

Get accountability partners. 

Nothing keeps me committed more than knowing my friends, family and peers are relying on me. You can seek accountability passively, or actively. I set up virtual happy hour with my co-workers this week, so I had to be there — and they were holding me accountable without even knowing it! Honestly, the last thing I wanted to do at 7pm on a weekday was talk for another 2 hours, but having that on the schedule, and knowing there were people I care about there expecting me, helped me follow through. And when I got there, I immediately felt SO good. Whether it’s a text, a Zoom conversation, or a phone call, lean on others. Which brings me to my last point…

Connect unconventionally. 

I thrive on other’s energy, ideas, and on developing deep connections with people, so talking to one or two other people at a time (or to your toddlers all day and night) doesn’t cut it for an extrovert like me. It needs to happen with many, and often. Teaching classes, and participating in virtual group learning sessions were my go tos, but now I’ve had to get really creative. I can’t tell you how many virtual dates I set up for myself this week. I’ve talked more to my friends and family this week, than I have in the past 6 months. Ask them how they’re doing. Play a game, exercise with your kids, have coffee with your partner, or go on a FaceTime walk. Who can you get to know better this week, what might you learn, and what haven’t you done with others, lately?

This is all temporary, and we don’t know for how long, but we can choose to tap into our agility we use so much at work, to make ourselves more comfortable where we are.

If you’re interested in learning more, click the link below to setup your free discovery call to learn how I can help!