The Environment in Whole Self Coaching

I grew up in a big house, with a big yard, and a pool in the middle of the woods of Connecticut. It’s picturesque. It’s peaceful. It’s lush. It was pretty perfect, but I felt isolated and trapped there most of my childhood, with a longing to travel and be in a big city. 

I’d really only been to New Haven with frequency (which was tiny, and didn’t really count) until my teen years when I finally got to NYC - and mainly to see Broadway shows. One of my strongest memories of Environment all coming together for me was this time in life. 

My parents begrudgingly allowed me to travel there for an overnight trip; to go and wander all day, then camp out on the streets of NYC with a group of my theater friends, to acquire free Rent tickets as part of a lottery. It paid off, and I had 1st-row seats for $25, 5 times! One time, I even had dinner with Anthony Rapp ahead of his performance which I’m sure he doesn’t remember. I felt like I was in my place; immersed in sights, smells, sounds, dirty shoes, people - even buildings that understood me. I decided I was going to move at 17, and I did in my mid-20s,  living there for nearly 13 years before I moved to California (p.s. I cherish the woods of CT now and love going back).

The outer world plays a huge part in our overall happiness. And, as much as we can control many things, there are just as many environmental factors we cannot. Our environment evolves in either case and while we can’t always change it, we can work to understand its influence on our overall well-being.

Here are some of the components of Environment to keep in mind, and potentially evaluate ahead of, or when you’re feeling untethered.

Basic Needs

If you haven’t checked out Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, I encourage you to check it out. In short, you can’t possibly have solid well-being, and self-improve if your basic needs like food, shelter, home, and safety/security needs are unmet. This is one of the areas I look at first with coaching clients, as we have a tendency to be hard on ourselves for not growing at the pace we want, even when we’re barely surviving by the hierarchy standards.

Financial Wellness

This is very much a basic need, but it deserves its own call-out because it’s so much more than having enough to survive. I am privileged to have enough. When I moved to NYC, I could barely eat and pay my rent. I was riddled with anxiety until close to my 30th birthday. Financial wellness = relief and empowerment. It can be an area of fear and avoidance too if you’re not paying attention to It. We live in a society where things tend to outweigh experiences. Spending money can be a coping mechanism for lack of self-confidence, and lack of belonging. Sometimes money masks a lack of clarity about what’s really important (your values, your purpose).

Systemic & Tectonic Challenges

Here come all the things mostly out of our control. We’re living in an unprecedented time of environmental crisis, loss of human rights, violence, systemic racism, and illness, and it’s hard to keep our heads above water, understandably. While that’s happening consistently, we’re inundated with news. We have our own lives happening too. Major life events like death, and even overtly happy ones like the birth of a child, or marriage all create waves and command both our attention and a need for a new set of tools to self-manage. 

Space

We know what it feels like to walk into a room, a city, a space and feel peaceful, like ourselves, energized, and safe, AT HOME. Your personal space has a direct impact on your health. Where you live, where you visit, and whether that place is clean/organized/dirty/an expression of you, is a big contributor to your mood, and productivity. Have a great space and you start to flourish.

Work

For most of us, work is one of the biggest priorities -  or at least takes up the most amount of time/energy in our day-to-day. Whenever a client is describing a toxic environment or a place that doesn't quite fit them and is surprised that their mental health is tanking, I always remind them… “OF COURSE you’re suffering!”. We’re not as good at compartmentalizing as we think. The people and the culture at work are paramount to both your contributions there, as well as your overall well-being when you leave. Things like autonomy, DEI, belonging, a supportive manager, and remote work all influence your contributions, and ability to innovate, and grow.

Are you ready to dive into matters of your environment? Click the link below to setup your free discovery call to learn how I can help!